Dating With Kids

So I've been thinking about the differences between when I was dating before my marriage to Ron and when I had started dating after my divorce. The big difference? Kids....

When my ex and I were dating we didn't have any kids that we were responsible for. Sure, he had a son, but he lived 300 miles up north with his mom. So dating was easy. It was just the 2 of us. We were able to come and go when we pleased. We never had to worry about finding a sitter. We could get through a whole meal at a restaurant without the sitter (ahem...my mom) calling to ask every 15 min when I'd be home. We were able to go out on numerous dates within a months time. We had all the time in the world to be alone together. (When he and I weren't working of course!) Life was simple. Dating was easy. It was fun.

Then there's dating after my divorce (and 2 kids later).... I've met the man I'd really like to share my life with. He and I can't see each other all the time. We can't really plan dates when we want to because we have to plan them around when we can get either my mom or grandma to watch them. We've been together for over a month now and we just barely had our fourth date. Meaning... we've only been alone 4 times for about 2-3 hours each time. It's just not as easy this time around. Josh and I will never get that... We will never get what Ron and I had. We already have an instant family to take care of. It changes the way you date.

I think I'm a little jealous of the people who got to date their (now) husband, planned a life together, started a family when they wanted to and are still happily married to this day. Don't get me wrong, I would not trade my boys for anything in the whole world... I just wish I had chosen a good husband and father the first time. If I did, I wouldn't be in the situation I'm in right now.

All in all, I think Josh and I are making the best of the situation. We take the boys out with us every where. We do fun stuff together like going to the park, the Zoo and Sea World. When we do get that precious alone time, we make the most of it.